If you find yourself feeling tired, pressed for time or drained before the start of a new week, it’s not by mere happenstance.
“It’s because the world is designed to steal your time and energy from social media to the crazy headlines that make you feel helpless, [to] endless work to-do lists,” bestselling author Mel Robbins said on her self-titled podcast last week.
Social media fatigue has risen in recent years, studies showas mindless scrolling leads to mental exhaustion. The country’s stagnant labor market can make work — or unemployment — particularly stressful, and waves of geopolitical news only add to the potential for emotional strain.
Robbins, a former lawyer whose experiences with anxiety and poor mental health led her to become a mindset coach and motivational speaker, uses a “simple” exercise to get her joy, focus and energy back each week, she said.
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The exercise may be simple, but it isn’t quick: Robbins completes seven different tasks over the course of seven days, and starts over again when each new week begins, she said. She does it “every week,” she added.
Here’s how it works.
Do a brain dump
Robbins recommends starting every new week by dumping all of your thoughts onto a piece of paper.
“I have done this for years,” she said. “Take out a piece of paper, and you just start writing down everything that is in your head, and it’s going to be random stuff … You’re going to start writing things like, ‘I’ve got to pick up the dry cleaning. I’ve got to make lasagna. I’ve got to call my mother.”
Journaling for at least 15 minutes a day can boost your problem-solving skills and help you recover from traumatic experiences faster, studies show. Robbins’ version helps her feel mentally lighter, and shows her just how many pent up thoughts are preventing from being clear-headed throughout the week, she said.
Mark up your list
After doing your brain dump, cross out or erase all the items you don’t actually intend to do that week. By doing so, you’re parsing your mental “junk drawer,” keeping the items that’ll help you have a happier, more productive week and letting go of the thoughts that just take up space, said Robbins.
“[If] you’re not doing it this week, cross it off,” she said. “Zero guilt — you are just claiming space.”
Set a priority
Look at your revised list and ask yourself, “What’s the one thing on this list that, if I make progress towards it by this weekend, I’ll feel really good about myself?”
Take your pencil, pen or marker and circle it — the bolder, the better, Robbins said.
You don’t necessarily have to commit to getting it done, especially if it’s a big task, she added: Putting aside a few minutes to work on it can be enough to feel some relief and pride by the week’s end.
Plan one meal and schedule one workout
Plan at least one of your meals for the week, whether it’s a home-cooked dinner or a lunch from your office commissary, Robbins recommended. Then, block off time on your calendar for at least one workout of any intensity, from a vigorous spin class to a 10-minute walk around your neighborhood.
Deciding what you want to eat on the fly can lead to mindless trips to the grocery store, or spending hefty amounts on takeout or delivery, Robbins noted. Planning even one meal per week can help you break that cycle — as can scheduling a single weekly workout, especially if you aren’t already particularly active.
The idea is to lay the foundation for new habits without putting an undue amount of pressure on yourself. Going straight from no planning to a fully-scheduled meal or exercise calendar is “never going to be realistic,” said Robbins.
Plan some R&R time
After you’ve accomplished your week’s most important task, or tasks, make time to rest and relax. “Just find one moment of quiet for you. That’s all I’m asking. My only requirement is that you’re not looking at your phone [or TV],” Robbins said.
Phones and television can be addictive, and you need to give your mind a break without entering into an hours-long trance, said Robbins. She recommended sitting at the park, taking an extra-long shower or walking a dog as potential activities.
Giving your brain a break, particularly during weekends, can help you enjoy your mid-week activities more, happiness researcher Cassie Holmes wrote for Harvard Business Review in 2019.
Holmes’ advice: Whenever you can, do all your household chores on one weekend day, and reserve the other entirely for the kinds of activities that make you feel the most relaxed and disconnected from your normal routine, she told the “Everyday Better with Leah Smart” podcast last year.
Connect with someone
If you have bottled-up thoughts and feelings, you can empty them out when talking with people you love and trust. Make time to connect with at least one of those people each week, said Robbins.
Set up a coffee chat with a close colleague or go out to dinner with a buddy from college. Even sending a quick text to someone can count. Those conversations can give you a chance to speak or vent freely without judgment, and they can go a long way toward sustaining the kinds of long-term positive relationships you need to live a longer, happier life.
“Making friends and keeping friends as an adult is really challenging because everybody’s super busy and everybody’s drained and everybody’s moving in a million directions,” Robbins said. “But this matters.”
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